Sunday, June 24, 2012

An incomplete list of things that have prevented me from falling/staying asleep in the last two weeks

- a cat steps on my neck - the Man snores - my ear is slightly bent/folded - a cat steps on my nipple - the pillow is touching my nose - I have a song in my head and I can't stop singing it - the Man puts his leg or arm on me and the weight causes my elbow or knee to hyper-extend - the sheet is bunched up between my fingers - a cat steps on my bladder - my arm is above my head and has lost feeling and then it moves and freaks me out - the future is coming and I have no idea what to do - I am literally trapped in place by cats/the Man/the sheets - I am figuratively trapped by my life and the choices I've made - the cats start fighting and topple off the bed - I can't remember the beginning of that quote from "Dexter" that I love

Last night I was at a very fun party for J's birthday and there were lots of theatre people there. At one point we were talking about Game of Thrones and this exchange happened -

 "Have you seen Game of Thrones?"
"Well, I know that there are tits and people get stabbed." Yes. Perfect.


modernhaus said...

The arm thing happens to me a lot. Nothing steps on my nipples. Sometimes I see my Lady Schick sitting there and I imagine it slicing my tongue. You're the first I've told.

Leslie said...

Near impossible self-maiming with objects of opportunity? I spend too much time thinking of stuff like that. I'll tell you some of mine if you want, but I'd hate for you to incorporate them into your roster of "unlikely mutilations"...