Yesterday I took the day off work. I felt…BAD. Stomach cramps, lots of time on the bathroom floor, not able to keep any food inside for long. Uuuuugh. So, I went to the doctor for the first time in five years (not the ObGyn, I go yearly). They took my pulse/blood pressure: I was dehydrated. They took my blood: It’s a virus. They asked me to provide a coughsamplecough. No, not that kind, the other kind I couldn’t do it. Luckily, it seems I’m on the upswing of being sick, so I’m back at work: um... Yippee!
Conversation between me and the nice elderly nurse who took my blood:
Nurse: wiping my arm with alcohol
Leslie: Err. I really don’t like this.
Nurse: Sweetie. Nobody likes this.
Leslie: Yeah. I’m just going to look over here. It’s not so bad. crane head 160 degrees toward window
Nurse: I always tell people “just pretend you’re someplace nice. Like Aruba. Beautiful beaches in Aruba".
Leslie: Well, if I’m in Aruba, WHAT THE HELL IS A NEEDLE DOING IN MY ARM?!?!?!
Nurse: looks disapproving Hmm. Fine. Forget Aruba.
I’m feeling much better now. I still have yucky gurgly cramps in my belly, but I’ve returned to a mostly-upright position. I still have to eat bland foods, though, and I’m not into that. Especially because I have all the stuff to make espresso-whiskey cupcakes and I really REALLY wanna make them. And eat them.
Maybe I’ll cheat a little.
2 comments:
just remember that if you make and eat the espresso-whiskey cupcakes and then you puke them up, you'll never, ever want them again.
hope you feel loads better soon!!
Dude, that blows so hard. I think I hate stomach bugs more than any other type of common illness. They actually make you wish you were dead... You know, when you're lieing on the bathroom floor... and you havn't eaten in two days and yet your body is still... Well, YOU obviously DO know. Anyway, BRATY diet for you, sweetums. (Banana, rice, applesauce, toast and yogurt). And gatoraide. And try not to die.
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