Monday, October 5, 2009

Once bitten...

Imagine, if you will, a vampire bite on someone's neck. It shouldn't be difficult - they're everywhere in the media these days. Now, move the 2 teeth marks about 4inches apart. Now, surround the bite marks with bruising. Now, move them from the sexy crook of the neck, to the back of the left thigh, riiiiight under the bum. Yup. That's where I got it.

On Saturday night, the man and I went to Carlysle to visit an old colleague, S, and her wife, K. They have 7 cats and 2 giant dogs. The bigger one is a black great dane, and the smaller one is a white poodly-thing approximately 3/4 the size of the great dane. Now, the Scooby is a hellhound-looking dog who, in reality, just wants to LOVE YOU. The poodly-thing apparently, approaches the world "with her mouth open". Yeah, I know.
I was just standing there, minding my own business, showing the two kind hostesses a couple of pictures, when BAM! I get mawed on the leg. I shrieked (Understandably! 3/4 of 140lbs is... a lot of lbs! With a strong jaw!). S asked: "Oh, did she poke you?" to which I calmly replied: "No, she ripped a chunk out of my ass!" and then I ran to the bathroom, dropped trou, and surveyed the damage. Ugly, peeps, ugly. I actually took a picture yesterday, but it's too grisly for blogging.

Ugh. So, yesterday I took it easy, and then at night, the man and I watched Gran Torino* and slothed (yup, it's a verb) on the couch and then went to bed. The cats even managed NOT to keep me up all night. Good kitties.

*Have you seen this? Clint Eastwood is the motherfucking MAN, man. How does he manage to be so BADASS at 79 years old? I would like to buy that man a beer. And a sandwich. And then, maybe introduce him to a dog I know...


So, anyway I'll make it, but it does hurt when I sit...

6 comments:

Just Another Idealist said...

That SUCKS about the dog, though I can't say I'm surprised. Little dogs are the devil, unless they come in dopey hound form.
AND I just netflixed that movie, so I'm glad to hear your assessment is so positive :-)

Yum said...

It wasn't a little dog - it was over 100 lbs!!!

You will NOT be disappointed in Clint.

Just Another Idealist said...

Oh, it was the big one?

Yum said...

Both of their dogs are enormous.

die Frau said...

Did they APOLOGIZE? Or do the, "Oh, he's usually so sweet!" thing?

Gran Torino is AMAZING. And Clint in that movie is my FIL. Truly. I'm not the only one who thinks this. But yeah, Idealist, watch it NOW.

Now, does this doggy bite mean your man might need to...ice it? Kiss it? Put soothing lotion on it? 'Cause that might be nice.

Wonderland said...

I agree with Frau, That might be nice. And yes, I loved Gran Torino. But, I have to admit, half way through I almost turned it off, it took so long to get going. But the end totally made up for it.