Monday, June 30, 2008


Last night (9:30ish?) I was walking home from Davis Square - the trip takes about 20 minutes, and the weather, though threatening rain, was pretty good. I walked past an apartment complex on Mass Ave and there was a woman on the stoop with her head in her hands. She was rocking back and forth a little. I had 2 thoughts:
1. Oh! Should I see if she's ok?
2. In a horror movie, this is where I'd find out she was a vampire because she'd fling herself at me with superhuman strength and suck all of my blood!

Before I was able to act on either of these thoughts, she bolted upright and started screaming and flailing about with what I can only describe as psychotic "jazz hands".
You KNOW me, you B*TCH!

No I DON'T!!!
Gaaah! What the hell? I guess she watched a lot of horror movies, too. I was happy that there was a gas station attendant next door having a smoke. Not that I thought he would have been much help in a scary blood-sucking event, but at least he may have borne witness when I sold my story to the National Enquirer...

Well, fear not. I made it home alive...BARELY! (cue dramatic music now)


die Frau said...

Oh, we used to get that a lot in the city...not so much in the 'burbs. Because Mom works at the soup kitchen in town, if a woman screamed that at her, it would probably be true. At any rate, she's a lot calmer about walking around since she now knows most of the unmedicated transients by name.

You should've yelled, "YOU NEVER CALLED ME BACK!" That would've thrown her.

GreenLight said...

HA! Awesome. I will try that next time.