Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Misconceptions about me based on my spam mail

1. I want to see hot sexy underage Asian women naked.
2. My penis is too small.
3. I cannot satisfy my boyfriend/girlfriend/goat in bed.
4. I am in desperate need of Canadian medications.
5. I would like a job selling insurance/Canadian medication.
6. I am suffering from a shortage of Viagra (for my small penis).
7. I am not getting enough girl-on-girl action (is anyone, really?).

So, I am stating here for the world to learn that none of these statements is true. I'm all set, thanks. I appreciate the concern, though, and I will keep your contact information for my records, should any of these problems come up in the future - like if I grow a penis, but it's really, really too small, and I want to satisfy my hot Asian goat in bed, I'll contact you for Canadian Viagra, and maybe some insurance coverage.

5 comments:

feather nester said...

Yeah, I've gotta tell ya, I've never heard Goat complain.

(psssst...I'm pretty sure she's not Asian, though...just sayin'.)

Unknown said...

That is way too hilarious! Sounds like you need a good spam filter. Totally loving your blog, by the way...keep up the great posts!

die Frau said...

nicely played, feather nester.

On a grammar dork note, thank you for writing "none of these statements IS true".

I apparently am in desperate need of a great watch, according to my spam filter.

Wonderland said...

Goat loves the attention and the stroking and the loving. But you do not need a tiny new penis to do it!

The Perfect Space said...

Funny post, but dude, it's the HOTMAIL (or maybe your workmail, I don't know). Gmail never lets spam like that get through to me! Just sayin...