Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Bumper to bumper

Dear Cross Bronx Expressway,

You suck SO much. You are dirty, smelly, and decidedly NOT scenic, and (I do not like stooping to insult your parentage, but) yo’ mama so ugly she make the George Washington Bridge look good. For serious, CBE, I was really truckin’ before I got to you. I was making good time. I was gonna join my brother, his girlfriend, and our friend J for STEAK. Steak that I wouldn’t have to pay for. Well forget that. Because of the 2+ hours I spent on your 4 miles, I was WAY TOO LATE FOR STEAK.

See ya, wouldn’t wanna be ya…


P.S. I suspect you are in cahoots with Rte 78, whose road work delayed me an extra hour – bringing my trip that should have been 6 hours to 9 hours.
On the bright side, I had a nice trip to my brother’s house. I got to meet his (girlfriend’s) 5 rescue dogs, and see our childhood friend J, or “J the Joker” as he is also known.

I’m quite happy I’m home now, and I will not be traveling back that way until my family visits me here in Boston first. It’s my turn.
So, last night, J, her man, my man, and I all went to say fare-thee-well to our favorite ER Doc, Dr. Monkey. As I write this, Dr. M is traveling to his new (old) home on the west coast. It’s a sad thing to lose him. But we all had a lot of drinks and tasty seafood in Providence to celebrate the Doctor’s awesomeness. Goodbye to our terrific, hilarious, smartypants Dr. M! We hope to see you soon!

1 comment:

die Frau said...

Already? Glad you sent off Dr. Monkey in style!

I also despise traffic. Now that I don't drive as much, the few times I'm stuck in any sort of rush hour, I marvel at how LITTLE road rage exists. Glad you made it home safely, even if you missed the steak.